Monday, June 15, 2015

Stupid People Saying Stupid Things


(All headlines via C&L)

Fox & Friends Blames Attack On Dallas Police And McKinney Pool Party On Lack Of Spankings
"No child ever died from spanking. They may have died from abuse, which is terrible. But a spanking never hurt a child, and never did anything more than probably embarrass him."
Hegseth agreed that bad parenting was part of the problem: "When fathers and mothers don't lay down actions, why respect those authorities?"
"We see it from teenagers to youth," he explained. "We also see it with adults with the [McKinney] pool party incident recently."

Okay, so you're going to put responsibility for the actions of an out-of-control white cop on the supposed disrespect for authority of the teens he terrorized. Sure, that's exactly what we've come to expect from you folks at FOX. But then you blame the "lack of respect for authority" that these black teens supposedly displayed on a lack of spankings?


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Have you ever met any black people? 

Ever swap stories about youthful shenanigans? Because I guarantee you, every one of their stories ends with "man did I get an ass-whooping that day!" 

Or, if you're too scared to talk to any actual black people, just watch any black comedian.  Remember Eddie Murphy used to do that bit about his mom throwing her high-heeled shoes at him like a boomerang?

  Or just search YouTube for "black mothers vs white mothers" You'll get plenty of examples of what I mean.





Now, obviously these are stereotypes and generalizations, and I know #NotAllBlackMoms, so don't yell at me in the comments. I'm just saying, if you have a problem with parents not spanking their kids, you need to take it up with white parents. Because black moms are fucking tough! 




Rick Perry: Obama Has 'A Lack Of Executive Experience'




Oh, so this is a quote from 2008, right? Back when Barack Obama's thin resume' was a bit of an issue, that makes sense. 

The candidate suggested that if Obama hadn't expressed a "lack of engagement to stop ISIS" in Syria, then the U.S. could have somehow eliminated both the terrorist network and Syrian President Bashar al-Assad, despite the fact that they were fighting each other and knocking one side down would have only bolstered the other.
"It's this lack of really being able to connect the dots, I think it's a lack of executive experience that this president has, as well as a philosophical void when it comes to understanding what it takes to keep America safe," Perry added

Isis? 
So. . . this is now?

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Right. Barack Obama has no experience being an executive. I mean, ya know, other than being the chief executive of the United Fucking States of America. But, other than that. . .







 

Romney: Biggest Mistake Was Not Focusing Early On Minority Voters



 Yes. That was it. That was the big mistake. If only you'd focused earlier on the voters with whom you had the least chance. 


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Christie: Raising Retirement Age Two Years Won't 'Stop The World From Spinning On Its Axis'


Yeah, ya know what else wouldn't? The occasional salad, governor!


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But seriously, folks. . .

No, raising the retirement age won't stop the world from spinning. It will add extra misery to the "golden years" of working people, but I guess that's a minor concern. You know, for assholes.


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Jeb: I Am Not George. I Am An Introvert

Wow, that's a hell of a selling point. "I'm different from the worst president in American History in that I am less outgoing."

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"I may not be any smarter than ol' George. I may not be any less corrupt. But by God, a vote for me is a vote for soft-spokenness!" 

"I may get this nation into just as many illegal, immoral, ill-advised and imprudent foreign wars as my brother, but I'm much less likely to strut around in a flight suit while doing it. Bush 2016!!!"